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  • I didn't want to believe my girlfriend was......

  • I didn't want to install backup cameras on my car,....

  • I didn't watch that famous documentary about paper......

  • I died last month....

  • I discovered a really long boulder when hiking in the woods last weekend....

  • I don't drink any more!...

  • I don't like dad jokes......

  • I don't like hanging around elevators....

  • I don't like toll roads....

  • I don't mean to brag, but my son was born today....

  • I don't mean to brag, but they've banned me from the hardware store....

  • I don't recommend using food coloring....

  • I don't take my IT Analyst buddies hunting anymore....

  • I don't think about the Roman Empire at all....

  • I don't trust my chess opponent to play honestly....

  • I don't trust stairs...

  • I don't want to be xenophobic but....

  • I don't worry about the future....

  • I dreamt of a good joke about the Ottoman Empire but now that I'm awake I can't remember all the fine details....

  • I dropped an egg onto a concrete floor and it didn't break....

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