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My manager told me to have a good day....
My mate John Cart had a son......
My mate was in the army....
My mermaid girlfriend left me for another merman....
My Mexican friends father took away his awesome model train set just because he didn't clean his room....
My mom sent me to a child psychologist......
My mom's sister stole my shorts....
My mother always said that she didn't have a favourite child....
My mother used to say the way to a man's heart is through his stomach....
My name is Dav......
My neighbor could not....
My neighbor was once the sound guy for a lot of famous bluegrass artists....
My neighbor who loves to BBQ was arrested yesterday....
My obsession with 17th century European style lead me to spend my entire life's savings transforming my home and wardrobe into that exact period....
My old dad used to say:...
My old dentist had his good days...
My parents thought if they "stacked" our beds we would like it and want to go to bed at our bed time....
My parents used to take me to see a child psychologist....
My pastor went to prison......
My penis was in the Guinness Book of......
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