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  • I invented an odour detecting device......

  • I just ate 288 sunflower seeds....

  • I just ate a frozen apple....

  • I just bought some invisibility cream....

  • I just burned 2,000 calories....

  • I just burned 2000 calories in 20 minutes....

  • I just burnt my Hawaiian pizza....

  • I just found a great website to get sausage online!...

  • I just found out that there is a name for when you can't sleep at night so you just eat instead....

  • I just got a new job as a......

  • I just got kicked out of a...

  • I just got some oranges from Mexico, apparently they're high in one specific nutrient....

  • I just grilled a chicken for two hours....

  • I just heard a new rumor about butter......

  • I just heard that a new chocolate bar is coming out that tastes like fish....

  • I just learned that the ancient Egyptians outlawed beans....

  • I just made $40,000 trading ground pepper futures....

  • I just ordered a golf ball from Swiss cheesemakers....

  • I just picked up my lunch from China King and the whole kitchen staff was passing around a joint....

  • I just read a study that found humans eat more bananas....

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