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  • 'Twas the night before Thanksgiving, and I'm in......

  • "An apple pie purchased in a Jamaican shop might cost around $4, but that same pie in Barbados goes for $5....

  • "Doctor, doctor!...

  • "Holmes"!...

  • "Honey, will you be pan frying the bacon for breakfast this morning?...

  • "How did you find the steak?...

  • "I'm thinking that I'll order 54 pizzas for the Star Wars convention this week....

  • "Listen guys, I'm not going to sugarcoat it....

  • "May ya live as long as ya want, and not want for as long as ya live" is an Irish toast....

  • "May ya live just as long as ya want, and not want for as long as ya live," is an Irish toast....

  • "My eyes are bigger than my stomach" is a normal thing to hear at a buffet....

  • "Sir!...

  • "So, how's the airline food?...

  • "The steak in this place is out of this world," my wife said....

  • "This is a very dense cake!...

  • "What are these pennies doing in my soup?...

  • "Which AP courses did you take?...

  • (Courtesy of my brother) What do you call a vegan trans man?...

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