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  • I can't seem to find my bag of kettle corn....

  • I can't stand Greek yoghurt......

  • I can't stand that German man....

  • I can't stand the sound of communication devices falling into soybean paste....

  • I can't think of a good egg pun......

  • I can't wait for dinner, I could eat for a whole country!...

  • I cannot count to 8 in French due......

  • i caught a fish once......

  • I cleared my cache of cookies....

  • I come from a long line of terrible......

  • I confused the words "jacuzzi" and "Yakuza"....

  • I considered grilling my cereal this morning, but decided against it....

  • I cooked an elaborate dish for my dog in order to bribe him into good behavior....

  • I cooked lunch for a friend and he proceeded to shove it up my butt....

  • I could tell a joke about pizza......

  • I could tell the wheat had been working out....

  • I couldn't stop laughing at how we shared appetizers at dinner!...

  • I cut my finger chopping cheese....

  • I decided I'm going to dress up as a hotdog with a beer mug for Halloween this year....

  • I decided that the ducks deserved a break......

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