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Me:...
Met a guy who said 'Hi, I'm a......
MF DOOM joke I just made up....
Mom:...
Monday and Tuesday got together on the side and made plans without telling anyone....
My Brother opened an Uncaged bird shop....
My car failed its emissions test today!...
My doctor is a D***head....
My favorite word starts with F and ends......
My friend said she's really starting to like Olivia Rodrigo....
My friend told he's a botanophile......
My insurance company called me last week....
My local bakery is charging one of its customers the cost of plumbing after said customer entered their establishment only to purchase a single baked good, then proceeded to unleash two violent bowel movements on one of their toilets....
My marine biology professor made good on his......
My neighbour's front garden has completely vanished....
My new puppy wakes up from his fart, starts barking, then falls back asleep....
My new puppy wakes up from his fart......
My son lives this one....
My son's gf is adopted....
My spouse keeps setting their farts on fire and I think it may be over between us....
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