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  • I only have Juan joke about Spanish......

  • I politely asked the surgeon if he minded......

  • I rarely find cocaine jokes funny....

  • I recently attended a get together for attractive idiots....

  • I sat my son down for the drugs talk....

  • I smoked a joint and once the munchies......

  • I started a poetry club in prison......

  • I started taking Prevagen to help with my memory....

  • I suddenly lost my phone and searching for......

  • I suffer from kleptomania....

  • I tell everyone that the food at the......

  • I think ambulances are on drugs....

  • I think my AA meeting is haunted......

  • I think my doctors are homophobic......

  • I think that the Z fighters would have been much better without Krillin, Yamcha, Tien and Piccolo....

  • I thought of dressing up as a Band Aid for Halloween....

  • I took a pill that caused me to pass out and poop my pants....

  • I took some pesto bismol at the casino......

  • I took some weed before my eye exam......

  • I tried out some very advanced new razors....

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