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  • I was a famous pianist......

  • I was arrested for flirting with a girl......

  • I was dating a girl named Ruth but I broke up with her....

  • I was desperatly searching for my favourite chocolate......

  • I was going to accuse my neighbor of......

  • I was gonna offer your mom a drink......

  • I was having a problem with drunks walking around my neighborhood causing trouble....

  • I was hoping to steal some leftovers from the party....

  • I was jumped by three huge guys in......

  • I was jumped in the alley by a gang of 25 cent pieces....

  • I was kidnapped by a cheapskate....

  • I was kidnapped by a group of mimes......

  • I was kidnapped by mimes once......

  • I was mugged by a guy wearing sunglasses and a pink rabbit suit who hit me with his drumsticks....

  • I was once kidnapped by mimes....

  • I was riding a donkey across the desert when some bandits jumped me and left me walking penniless and barefoot to town....

  • I was robbed by two huge Swedes......

  • i was sentenced to prison......

  • I was sitting on the roof of my bus depot thinking deep thoughts when the cops arrested me....

  • I was speeding....

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