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I can't believe viruses and bacteria just invade my body without my consent....
I can't fucking stand Romanian women....
I can't tell whether my new car's suspension is amazing, or if im sociopath....
I caught accused a guy of stealing a torso from the morgue today....
I caught my neighbour stealing socks from my washing line....
I chased a man through an apartment block today....
I confused the words "jacuzzi" and "Yakuza"....
I could never be a kleptomania victim...
I couldn't catch the thief on the stairs......
I couldn't find the obituaries in the newspaper......
I don't like it when inmates record anions....
I don't sea why everyone is so shocked......
I don't understand, why Sauron forged "one ring to rule them all"....
I failed to qualify for work removing gold......
I finally got my wish today when an armed robber lovingly embraced me during a bank heist....
I got arrested because I didn't want to......
I got arrested for doing 1000 sit-ups in my own house!...
I got arrested for doing skids in the......
I got arrested for hiring a guy named Jung Tu Kook as my chef....
I got arrested the other night, I left my car at the bar and took the bus home....
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