Today's featured daily humor:
I went to the store and bought some tomatoes I raised them as my own, taught them everything. They made graduated top of their class in tomato high school. They applied to the top colleges in the country and were rejected from all of them, because colleges don't accept tomatoes as students. When they read the rejection letters, they were devastated. I immediately put them in a bag and took them home to my wife. She said "these aren't the kind of tomatoes asked for" I said "Yes they are! You clearly said you wanted crushed tomatoes!"