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  • My wife bought this machine....

  • My wife got a deal on clothes 50% off....

  • My wife has bought some concealer......

  • My wife left me and took all my dough....

  • My wife purchased three ears of corn today......

  • My wife said she wanted me to buy her something that will go from 0 to 160 in just a few seconds....

  • My wife said that I am the cheapest......

  • My wife wants to have our landscaper......

  • My wife was livid when I told her I used all of our savings to buy stock in Bose....

  • My wife was upset I won't contribute in......

  • Never doubt the US Mint......

  • new cryptocurrency......

  • Not to brag or anything....

  • Not trying to brag about my finances but....

  • Of my many luxury cars, which would I least want to take scuba diving?...

  • On her deathbed I asked my Italian grandma for life advice....

  • One blackbird began avoiding the others, quietly hanging out at night with the owls....

  • One of my friends fell in a deep hole in my backyard, so I bought him some glasses....

  • One of my house keys booked a walking......

  • Our furniture goes back to Louis the 14th....

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