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  • I saw a theatre performance about vocabulary....

  • I saw someone in the supermarket with a stick inside one of the wheels....

  • I Say I Say I Say - What insect can't make its mind up?...

  • I showed my son a photo of me and said, "This was taken seven years ago....

  • I showed up late to the Oppenheimer cinema screening....

  • I sold my vacuum a few days ago......

  • I spent $1,000 on LED speakers that change color with the music....

  • I spent a small fortune on my circumcision......

  • I spent all my money collecting every bird species in my zoo, except one....

  • I spilled milk on my foot the other......

  • I started a business selling necklaces made from broken violin parts....

  • I started a nightclub for guys with erectile dysfunction....

  • I started my diet by removing all the fattening food from the house....

  • I started taking Prevagen to help with my memory....

  • I stopped my toddler from pulling vines off the house....

  • I studied cave exploration in college....

  • I survived falling from 12 story building....

  • I think I have a dog....

  • I think I said something wrong to the skid marks in my toilet, they're nowhere to be seen....

  • I think the wife is dyslexic......

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