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My friend got fired today from septic tank cleaning....
My friend had to quit his 6-figure job in cybersecurity....
My friend Hans got so drunk we had to carry him to the car to go home....
My friend is known for breaking records......
My friend Kart got fired at his job......
My friend keeps telling me the same stuff......
My friend lost his car....
My friend lost his toes in an accident, and can no longer drink milk....
My friend Mark changed his name to something else, but is now considering changing it back to Mark again....
My friend opened a candy shop specializing in cake toppers with people's ages....
My friend sadly got cancer and is now......
My friend was kidnapped by mimes......
My friend who is of great heights was telling me stories the other day....
My friend's wife broke him out of prison....
My friends Douglas and Katherine were yelling at each other yesterday....
My friends got a new house, and I paid for them to get underfloor heating....
My friends roommate broke the ceramic insert to......
My friends son was born without eyelids....
My friends went tent camping on the beach, and were eaten by marine mammals....
My girlfriend broke up with me and took all my pasta....
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