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  • When I was a kid, my mother told me I could be anyone I wanted to be....

  • When I was a teen I was addicted......

  • When I was in the military, I fed cookies to the other soldiers....

  • When I'm in a bad mood, it hurts......

  • When is the best time to ask someone a question?...

  • When it comes up to keeping up with the recent news, being deaf really proves to be a barrier....

  • When Jim Carrey hit the gym he made a sequel to a previous movie....

  • When my Son was being mean to my......

  • When someone tells me they are going to take a piss or sh!...

  • When superman forgot how to fly, he...

  • When The Cookie Monster can't sleep......

  • When you can't stop telling everybody about how bad the performance of particular quartet piece was....

  • When you have a bladder infection....

  • When you're committed to dad jokes....

  • When you're under the sea, and an eel......

  • When your audio device or software can't fix a noisy source....

  • When your boobs are bouncing more than hers....

  • When your nose runs, and your feet smell....

  • When your sibling is in a tough spot......

  • Whenever my kids say something ridiculous, I count odd numbers....

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