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  • I joined a pyromaniacs forum the other day......

  • I just burned 2,000 calories....

  • I just burned 2000 calories in 20 minutes....

  • I just got my headlights replaced......

  • I just love trying to pack myself in a small suitcase....

  • I just opened my water bill and electricity bill at the same time....

  • I just quit my job to go throw......

  • I just spent the last 3 hours changing......

  • I knew a mechanic at a muffler shop....

  • I learned about electricity today...

  • I like jokes from old Shakespearen plays......

  • I like to listen to music while I'm fishing....

  • I love telling dad jokes......

  • I need a power strip to plug stuff into....

  • I needed to heat up my cycling gear......

  • I noticed my friend got a new smart thermostat....

  • I once ate a watch....

  • I once dreamt that I was an oil field....

  • I only trust pilots who are licensed...

  • I out went to dinner with a friend......

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