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  • I stopped believing yesterday....

  • I think brackets really clarify......

  • I totally misunderstood the meaning behind Pride Month....

  • I traveled here specifically for the holy iron and now it turns out, there is nothing like that here....

  • I tried to get into a relationship with an invisible person....

  • I try to laugh at my optometrist's jokes,......

  • I was accosted by this rude Greek fellow....

  • I was asked to find the relative position......

  • I was asked what my opinion on cheese......

  • I was bowled over by an inanimate object......

  • I was trying to find impostor in the dictionary....

  • I was trying to illustrate the importance of a paved highway to my kid....

  • I went on a candy bar diet......

  • I will never understand why manslaughter is illegal....

  • i would feel weird not wearing a tuxedo......

  • I'd like to invent a new name for......

  • I'd never sign up to a human-cloning program....

  • i'm climbing the corporate ladder......

  • I'm glad I don't have to hunt for my own food....

  • I'm surprised I've never seen a priest wearing tank tops or yoga pants....

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