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I told this attractive woman that I thought she was beautiful and she called me a sexist....
I tried to flirt my way out of a ticket telling the officer that if I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put "U" and "I" together....
I tried to re-marry my ex-wife, but she figured out....
I tried to re-marry my ex-wife......
I tripped over my wife's bra in the bathroom....
I turned 85 earlier this year, and my driving skills are declining....
I used to be addicted to Masturbation but......
I used to be an amateur crastinator,......
I wanted to hire a prostitute but it......
I was arrested for flirting with a girl......
I was asked if I had any jokes about the sub....
I was at the pub last night & a woman got her nipple pierced right in front of me....
I was born with 5 dicks....
I was getting tired of hooking up with this woman I met through a dating app for cannibals....
I was going to tell a joke about......
I was having sex with a 10/10 when suddenly a fire broke out....
I was in an unfortunate accident with an......
I was mad at my wife after...
I was supposed to meet a snowstorm today....
I was telling my friend that my rather chunky girlfriend had admitted to cheating on me with the NFL player Tyreek Hill....
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