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  • My steak always comes out fine....

  • My super athletic friend William always carries protein powder around with him....

  • My sweater picks up too much static electricity......

  • My tenant cancelled the lease on his apartment to enlist in the military....

  • My tractor left me....

  • My uncle died from a donut overdose copyright......

  • My Uncle Elroy used to sell pants for 25 cents apiece....

  • My uncle got abducted by a UFO......

  • My uncle lost his left side in a......

  • My uncle named his dogs Timex and Rolex....

  • My uncle the arsonist was well liked at parties....

  • My uncle was a successful farmer......

  • My uncle, Don, has a suspenseful son....

  • My Uncle's a lion tamer, and when he went bankrupt they took nearly everything....

  • My uncle's pet donkey passed away and they......

  • My Visa was declined at the sweater store....

  • My weird uncle Jimmy used to complain that his kilt was to short and I thought he was crazy....

  • My wife accused me of being a cross......

  • My wife accused me of being a transvestite....

  • My wife almost divorced me......

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