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  • My brother and I used to fight a......

  • My brother said he won 2 off a scratchcard....

  • My building superintendent refused to come over and......

  • My candle store got robbed......

  • My car construction project was really picking up......

  • My chicken decided to change careers and become a fighter....

  • My dad and my brother were arguing over......

  • My dad came before I did....

  • My dad constantly criticizes me for not wearing our traditional Scottish family attire....

  • My dad didn't trust anyone....

  • My dad doesn't believe in pencil sharpeners....

  • My dad has great reflexes....

  • my DAD is a pro boxer with 25-0 record....

  • My dad wants me to take over the......

  • My dad works at a coffee shop, and......

  • My dad yelled at me when he found out that I opened a clothing accessories shop that sold one item only....

  • My dating life has suffered dearly ever since I replaced my penis with a light switch....

  • My daughter accused me of making outdated pop culture references....

  • My daughter asked what was for dinner....

  • My daughter burned me......

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