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  • The doctor said I have no magnesium in my blood....

  • The female janitor at work keeps asking me if I want to smoke a joint with her....

  • The guy who created cryptograms died last week......

  • The guy who invented Ovaltine made loads of......

  • The local authorities arrested a ghost who was......

  • The optician's just told me I need a much stronger prescription....

  • The Youtube addict can only subtract, divide, and multiply....

  • There are so many jokes about ED in this sub....

  • There was a bright scientist who cloned himself......

  • There's a new "Door Dash" type service for cocaine....

  • There's a new show on Netflix....

  • These days Willem Dafoe has problems....

  • They did a lot of great crimes, but did you ever hear about Bonnie and Clyde's PDA?...

  • They recent found evidence that blacksmiths sold cannabis....

  • They said I can't go to the water......

  • They say laughter is the best medicine......

  • They tried to make me go to Christmas rehab....

  • Thieves have stolen 20 crates of Red Bull......

  • This morning my wife expressed deep concern that my doctor might be having memory problems after he incorrectly prescribed me double dosage Viagra tabs yesterday....

  • To prepare for my newborn, I practiced diapering anything I could get my hands on to the point that I scared my wife....

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