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  • 'Am I adopted?...

  • "Dad I'm bored"......

  • "Dad, am I adopted?...

  • "Dad, I don't want to go to school today....

  • "Dad, where did I come from?...

  • "Dad, where's Antarctica?...

  • "Dad," said my son....

  • "Do you think I'm good at golf, dad?...

  • "Hey son, do you want to check out these vegan wool blankets with me?...

  • "Hey son, you know what that white stuff is in bird poop?...

  • "Hey, Lizard!...

  • "How come you get all the girls?...

  • "How did you and daddy meet?...

  • "I feel like a kid again!...

  • "I'm not very good at explaining things," said my son....

  • "If you had a dollar," quizzed the teacher, "and you asked your father for another dollar and fifty cents, how much money would you have?...

  • "If you have bare feet you have to put on shoes....

  • "Junior, why do you keep posting pics of my Model S on r/teslamotors?...

  • "Kids, did you know that I met...

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